inspired by the end

What does dying look like
or dying well
or living well
are they two separate things?
i would guess that it is one process
that we are choosing how we will die now

we seem to pick paths
without evidence
without RHYME without REASON

and if that is true
what should we do
what should we be doing in our life
what should we expect in our death

The world presents itself
slowly unfolding
(the amount of it that we see)
data trickles in through our senses
But no one can escape the boundaries of perception
no one can penetrate past what is available

the END is intangible, illusive
it defies conceptualization
it resists acknowledgement

the cacophony of color
the tyranny of noise
the onslaught of smells
the barrage of flavors
the blankets of tactile sensation
assaults our interior world
in the years before death
the body decays
so do the memories
the dreams are mostly dead
does the pain remain?
do rose-colored glasses render mountainous disasters into mole-hills?
i hope so

would a turing test run on a baby or a terminal patient?
what’s your home, baby?

are you from another world?

did i know you?
do i know you?
can i know you?

in a car, staring out the window, you see other cars

where is everyone going?
they travel fast.
a girl, squashed between two bookshelves, cranes her neck to see a book on the top shelf
what is she looking for?
a book, for a section, for a question, for a citation, for a paper, for a class, for a degree, for an education, for a career, for a life, a whole life – made up of what

are we going for the same thing?

unified pursuit
of happiness
of truth

what did we want then,

to be gods? not just men?

~from Apotheosis Wikipedia entry~

can we know everything?

can you describe a leaf to me
can you give me a unified theory of leaves
all there is to know about leaves
everything about leaves
each vein, all veins
the pigment
can you predict its life span
can you classify its shape
can you eradicate its poisonous genes
can you document its variation
can you measure the diameter of its stem
its caloric content
can you number its chloroplasts
can you inspect its mitochondria

why are they supposed to look like this: but a fancy camera takes a picture like this

that’s a leaf:

depends on the camera

why are there trees everywhere?

why are we so incredibly incomplete

waiting, becoming, not arriving


not arriving – Beckett

reading books in high school = our intellectual tradition

what is traditional hope
where do we go future aim shoot try intend