Diving Deeper into Medicine
“Sarah Scott”
I can confidently say that my hospice experience this year has been everything that I had envisioned and more. Last year, COVID made it difficult for me to have a traditional hospice experience. This year, I have been able to meet with a patient in person, “Deborah”, and my experiences with her have truly provided me with a deeper understanding of myself, of the dying process, and of what it means to work in the medical field.
My relationship with “Deborah” has blossomed over the past few months. I consider it a very special relationship because she is the first hospice patient that I’ve worked with. Even though I am the one visiting her and offering care to her, she also cares for me deeply, and that’s something that I didn’t necessarily expect going into this experience. I figured it would be very much one-sided, but the fact that the emotional care is mutual is something very beautiful and unexpected to me. She is always eager to do fun things with me like word searches or puzzles, and loves going outside to get some fresh air and feel the sun on her face. “Deborah” has taught me about the significance of small acts of kindness. She never fails to put a smile on my face when she offers me her food or compliments my outfit that day. She has taught me how to be a better person. She is so appreciative of the time that I take to visit her, which is a constant reminder of why I do this kind of work. She reminds me of the importance of maintaining my own family ties, in the way that I see how a phone call from her sister or from one of her grandchildren brightens her whole day. The pride she has in her children and grandchildren is so evident, which inspires me to want to do better, not only for myself, but for my family as well. It is difficult because she is aware of her declining condition and often apologizes when she forgets things or struggles to hear what I’m saying, but I always reassure her that she is surrounded by so many people who love her and care for her. I’ve learned that I need to advocate for her when her family isn’t there because she can’t always do that for herself. I often get upset when I have to leave her because I hate the reality of her being lonely, but it’s comforting to know that I’m doing whatever I can to make a positive impact on someone else’s life. Being a hospice volunteer is certainly emotionally taxing at times, but I must say that the happy moments far outweigh the sad ones.
Throughout my time with this hospice program, I have been reminded that we are all humans at the core and that it is our experiences and emotions that connect us to each other. I believe that I’ve gained so much emotional maturity in having the opportunity to interact with a patient this semester. I’ve become more comfortable with the dying process in that I’ve learned how to embrace it and cope with it. I feel that I am a much more cultured person because of the diverse experiences presented through this program, and I’ve realized that I am more than capable of handling this aspect of the medical field.
My hospice work has impacted my sense of vocation in that it has allowed me to contemplate what is significant to me and has helped me to determine what a meaningful life would be. My work has given me the opportunity to realize that working in the medical field is so much more than simply treating patients. It requires empathy, thick skin, and emotional diligence. My experiences with hospice have provided me with clarity that working in the medical field is something that I want to do for the rest of my life. This work is both emotionally and mentally challenging, but thanks to my interactions brought about by this program, I know that I am ready for it.
I believe that this program has so much value for medical school, in that it helps to shape the perspectives and goals of future medical professionals towards a more holistic side of medicine. Typically, in undergraduate and medical school, students are not trained in this aspect of medicine, even though it is so crucial. It requires a huge amount of emotional strength and a deep understanding of human nature. There is a large emotional and spiritual aspect of medicine that people often overlook, which a lot of times requires interaction with patients and their families. I believe that this program is extraordinarily beneficial in that it provides students with the chance to gain the patient experience that will allow us to determine if we are meant to work in the medical field.