My hospice volunteer experience was completely different from my expectations, but still beautiful in some ways I expected and some ways that surprised me. With a partner, I began visiting a patient, Laura, in October. When we first me her, we were blown away by how healthy she appeared. Laura was walking around, dancing with us, always chatting, and excited to tell us the gossip of the nursing home. Laura passed away just last week, so she was the only patient we visited with this year. The relationship I had with her was one of the most impactful ones of my life.
Laura was tough, tougher than I am. She had real grit and was never afraid to speak her mind. I was always so impressed with how she advocated with herself. She didn’t have any visitors or family, so she called us “her girls.” Over the course of six months, our relationship changed. At the beginning, Laura did the most talking, but she later became more sick and tired, so we had to do more talking. Laura reminded me of the importance of having people around who love us. She frequently told me to tell my Mom I love her because I would regret every time I did not. She wanted us to be confident and sure of ourselves in the same way she believed in us. The confidence she had in me meant more than anyone else because of how honest she was. I knew Laura would not say something unless it was true.
While I had gone into this experience with the hope of keeping someone company in what must be one of the scariest times in life, I never expected for this experience to have such an impact on me. Getting to know Laura reminded me not to sweat the small stuff and gave me a friend will be with me for a long time. During one of the last conversations I had with Laura, she told me she never would have expected that two teenage girls, 60 years younger than her, would become the people who she most looked forward to seeing and who she was closest to at the end of her life.
I would describe this program as beneficial to a medical school because it reinforces the importance of quality of life, human dignity, and bedside manner. It also reminded me about the importance of caring, even if these emotions make my job difficult and even when I am tired. When I was in the nursing home, it was clear who really put their heart into their job everyday. Through this experience, I have learned so much about what it means to be a healthcare professional and the importance of dignity and quality of life. Volunteering in hospice has changed my definition of dignity and shaped my view of vocation. In the medical field, healing should not just be about the body, but also about the mind to allow a person to maintain their dignity through it all.