It feels just like yesterday that I visited my first hospice patient in the hospital. I can attest that it was one of the most nerve wracking experiences I had undergone. I felt like there were certain things that I had to say, and I had to say them at the right times in order to satisfy the patient and their families. Then I proceeded to visit my first round of patients, and I came out with a great sense of relief.
I realized that patients weren’t looking for me to say anything specific, but they appreciated my company nonetheless. This allowed me to directly experience how people handle the end of life and what these patients need in their last moments. Sometimes I would visit patients who didn’t wish to speak with me, but only wanted my company and nothing else. We discussed in our meetings what it is that patients want when they are nearing the end of life. Among the values we discussed, two of them stuck out to me as relevant to the job I do, and what I can personally offer to patients. These values were love and reassurance. I took these values personally, and I aimed to improve my rhetoric when speaking with hospice patients and their families.
Love is essential for any patient going through end-of-life care. Whether it comes from family, caretakers, or volunteers, it is critical that patients know that they are loved in some sense. This gives them the fulfillment that they are leaving something behind with us once they leave. Reassurance is essential for patients as well. Patients can be assured that all of their worries that they leave behind will be taken care of, whether it’s a request for family, or it’s something that we as caretakers can provide. It’s important that patients have all of their desires granted so that they can leave us with a strong sense of internal peace. Ultimately, these values showed me how to communicate with those who are severely sick, and how I can better improve my rhetoric so that I can offer the best treatment for the patient as I can.
During my time volunteering in the hospital, I decided I wanted to expand myself and offer my help in other places who may need it. I decided to begin doing house visits, which was not much different from what I was doing at the hospital. One patient in particular, who I will call Joe had a significant impact on me throughout my time visiting. Joe was only three years older than I am and has late stage Huntington’s disease. I made it part of my weekly routine to visit him on Saturday mornings, where we would get together and play the usual Lego Star Wars trilogy, and collect as many “studs” as we possibly could.
Although our time was cut short due to the coronavirus pandemic self-isolation protocols, the experience that we both gained is certainly immeasurable. First, the patient further solidified my knowledge of speaking with patients, merely because he was more than a patient to me—he had become my friend. The patient further demonstrated the value of reassurance in end-of-life care. Although he did not express it, I knew that Joe needed a friend during his care. He was given endless love by his family, but he needed someone to escape reality with, where he could dive into a video game to feel normalcy once again. That’s something I could do, and I’m proud to say that I made a difference in offering this to him.
Overall, this program has significantly enhanced my aspirations in becoming a physician. Considering all that I have learned, and what I intend to learn in the future, I believe that this program will truly give me the invaluable knowledge of not only treating death and dying, but treating patients of all conditions in the best way possible.