From just one hospice visit, I learned that near the end of life, you begin to find beauty in the mundane and simple. During a visit with a new patient, we spent our entire time together talking about food. My patient was commenting on the breakfast food she had in front of her, wondering if what she was eating was “good” in a vague sense. As she inspected and observed each thing on her plate, I realized that she was appreciating everything that I was taking for granted. As I visited her again and again, I felt our connection growing stronger as we had meaningful yet simple conversations about life with topics ranging from overcoming difficulties and doing good for others.
Even though my role required me to act as my patient’s caretaker, I almost felt like my patient was taking care of me. For instance, in one of my more recent visits, I was helping her color a coloring book page, and although I asked her what color she wanted, she insisted that I should pick the color that I liked. Even when she was nearing the end of her life, she expressed concern for me, caring more about what I want than what she wanted. These heartfelt interactions made this experience rewarding and formative, not only for my medical career, but also for my growth as a person, by shifting my viewpoint on what makes life meaningful.
This program is valuable in my path to medical school because it educates students about a part of healthcare that is not discussed enough. College coursework may prepare students for the medical and scientific aspects of healthcare, but it does not directly provide opportunities to interact with patients. The social elements of medicine are often overlooked and undervalued, since doctors are perceived as authoritative while patients are complicit. Furthermore, death is generally a taboo subject in our society, causing people to hesitate or fear conversation about it. However, doctors and patients must converse and listen to each other on an equal level about death. Patients can learn about the benefits and risks of treatments, while doctors listen to the patients’ concerns, values, and desires. I learned from my hospice experience that medicine is less about saving as many people as possible and more about listening to the patient and providing the best quality of life for them. Even if that means letting them die as long as they lived their final days in accordance with their wishes.
Through my hospice experience, I have grown as a person and as a student pursuing a career in medicine. I have learned that death is not as scary or as depressing as society makes it out to be; there is a real beauty in the thoughts and words of someone nearing the end of life. My hospice work has further inspired and encouraged me to pursue my vocation in medicine with a new perspective on both life and death.