During my time as a hospice volunteer, one of the most meaningful relationships I formed was with a patient I will call “Flower.” Over several months at Daylesford Crossing, our visits became something I looked forward to. One moment that stood out to me was when “Flower” asked us to bring her back to her room and invited us to sit in her chairs. That small gesture meant a lot because it showed how much she valued our presence and how comfortable she had become with us. It made me realize that even just showing up consistently can create a meaningful connection.
Through my relationship with “Flower,” I learned how important it is to slow down and be present. Sometimes she would get confused or frustrated when she forgot things, but instead of trying to correct her, I learned to listen patiently and meet her where she was. This experience changed how I think about care. Before hospice, I associated healthcare mostly with treatments and interventions. However, “Flower” showed me that connection and presence can be just as important. Listening to her talk about her family and past also reminded me how quickly life moves and how important it is to appreciate time with the people I care about.
My hospice experience has also shaped my sense of vocation in medicine. Watching Being Mortal reinforced many of the lessons I was already beginning to learn. The video discusses how doctors are trained to fix problems and often see death as a failure. However, in hospice, I have seen that death is not something to “fix,” but something to approach with compassion, honesty, and respect for the patient’s wishes. The idea that aging and dying are “unfixables” stood out to me because it shifts the role of a physician from curing to caring. A good physician is not just someone who extends life at all costs, but someone who understands what matters most to their patient and helps them live meaningfully, even at the end.
This experience has helped me grow in ways I didn’t expect. I’ve learned to be more comfortable with silence and to really listen without feeling like I need to immediately respond or fix something. Hospice has also pushed me outside of my comfort zone, whether that is sitting with someone who is nearing the end of life or going about emotions that do not have clear answers. These moments have made me more resilient and more aware of the emotional responsibilities that come with patient care. I now see myself not just as someone who wants to treat illness, but as someone who wants to support patients as whole people, especially in their most vulnerable moments.
If I were describing this program in a medical school application, I would describe it as a transformative experience. Hospice volunteering has taught me lessons that cannot be learned in a classroom. It has shown me the importance of empathy, active listening, and understanding a patient’s values. Most importantly, it has exposed me to the emotional side of medicine. This includes grief and the reality that not every situation has a clear answer.
Overall, my experience with “Flower” and my time in hospice have changed how I view both life and medicine. I will carry the lessons I learned with me throughout my journey to becoming a physician.